Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I look better un-naked...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
