Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
