Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
