I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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