can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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