Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
