Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
