I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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