I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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