seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
