I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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