I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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