You just made me feel so damn special
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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