Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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