woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
