Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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