She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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