Swine flu. Run for my life!
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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