Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Randomize