I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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