This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Randomize
