Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
We just shotgunned beers for America
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
