420 ftw
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
