You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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