i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Randomize
