I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
