That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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