i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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