we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
