Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
