I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
