There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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