Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
