doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
