JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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