That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
