i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
