Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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