he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
