he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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