were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
