So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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