Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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