small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
