do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
