i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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