...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
