i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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