I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
When are your genitals available?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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