I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize